Friends for a Reason, Friends for a Season, And Forever Friends

A friend once told me that he categorizes the people in his life as "Friends for a Reason, Friends for a Season, and Forever Friends".

I pushed back at the time thinking it was too easy to label the people in our lives but now I think he's right. Every day- people come into my life as others leave. What makes them fall into one category or the other? Why do some people immediately click and in a blink of an eye-you can't imagine your life without them? And yet other relationships you are constantly working at to make work. What makes a friend a friend?

Like most- I have moved several times in my life picking up and leaving those who are dear to me and while we say we will "keep in touch", you know as I do that that rarely happens.

I like to say that the world is "self sorting". Meaning that those that are truly "forever friends" stick with you no matter what. And those that fall into the acquaintance category ebb and flow like the ocean. What I love best about "forever friends" is that no matter how much time has passed since you last saw or spoke to them- the moment you re-connect, it is as if no time passed at all.

Case in point. I have known my best friend since I was 15. We met in High School for the mere reason our names were alphabetical and therefore our lockers were next to each other. We really had nothing in common but we took those differences and turned them into a lifetime relationship. We are both the sister the other never had. We have not lived in the same city for over 25 years but no matter how much time elapses between visits, it is as if no time has passed. That is a forever friend.

Friends for a Reason are a little tougher for me to describe, for if someone is only with you for a reason, is that really a friend? That person may not even be aware that they are doing it, but ever since my friend brought this category of friend to my attention, I look for it now. Am I a little jaded? You bet.

There were days when I had nothing to offer that this kind of friend didn't even cross my mind. But today- people try to "friend" me for all kinds of reasons- connections, jobs, money, business, you name it. I recently had someone put my name as a reference for a job who I had only met once in a bar two years ago. When the recruiter called? I barely recognized the name. Definitely a "Friend for a Reason".

And "Friends for a Season" are those people who you are sure will turn into "Forever Friends", but through time, the connection fades, the glow dulls and you find yourself wondering when you are out with them, why you ever connected with them in the first place. Sad but true.

Take stock of the people in your life. Where do they fall? Are they there for a Reason? For a Season? Or are the people you surround yourself with, real "Forever Friends". You decide.