The Age Old Debate

You know, there might be one difference that even the best of us cannot solve for in a relationship. We tackle the easy things like what side of the bed do you like to sleep on (for me- it's always the left), which way the toilet paper should hang (I'm an over girl)and whether you put water on your toothbrush before or after you add the toothpaste (I'm a little of each). But the one difference that seems insurmountable time and time again is the issue of a morning person versus a night person.

Now try as I might- I will never be a morning person. I swear I'm nocturnal. I do my best thinking after noon and have no problems staying up til the wee hours with boundless energy.

Yet relationship after relationship, I find myself with guys at the other end of the sleep spectrum. These beings are like foreigners to me, springing out of bed at crack of dawn (no- I am sure that some times it is not even dawn when they leap up).

I groan and roll over and am not heard of for at least a few more hours. Yet during the time I am at my best,in the dead of night, where are these morning creatures? Fading fast, and all but dead to the world. It is like their light has been shut off.

So I decided to try an experiment. Could I, the habitual nocturnal soul TURN into a morning person? I decided to give it a try for a month.

I set my alarm for 5am. The first day, in my stunned, disoriented state, I poured juice on my cereal and put milk in the coffee maker. Not a good start. And as the days wore on, I was tired. By 8pm- I was ready for bed. This little experiment was seriously cutting into my night life. Cripes! Under my usual schedule, I wasn't even thinking about where to eat until 8. And now each day I couldn't wait to hit the hay.

They say that once your body gets used to something it will do it on it's own. Well let me tell you- 5am wake ups are never going to be the norm for this girl.

With that effort as an abysmal failure, I asked the man in my life ,at the time, to do a similar experiment only in reverse. He needed to sleep in more and stay up later for one month.

Seriously, he just couldn't sleep in. He'd lay there in the morning, trying to make me happy, staring up at the ceiling, breathing in that way that only men do, just itching for me to wake up so he could get up. And at night? We'd go out to enjoy a dinner and I would always end up driving home as his eyes were closing and head bobbing before we even left the restaurant. He begged to be let out of the experiment long before the month was over.

So I posit that we are what we are. Creatures of the day or creatures of the night, living our best on one side or the other. How about you? Which side do you fall on? And while you're at it . . .how is your toilet paper on the roll?